Recant

So I meant every word that I said from my Screw Tape Letters post. I really did.

However, I feel like some probably got the wrong idea from this. I'm not saying watching tv is inherently evil, or that you can't enjoy playing video games.

Screwtape

I picked up an audio version of The Screwtape Letters (CS Lewis) at the library today. It is part of my sorta pilgrimage for the next month to couple of months. Trying to learn more about this God I have a renewed sense of faith in.

Except that's where my pilgrimage stopped. I started the frying pan, whipped up some healthy oat pancakes and.... began to watch The Walking Dead (zombie show).

Man, I watched 3 or 4 episodes already, then hygiene won out and I went off to take a shower.

They say your mind works overtime in the shower, that you are more creative, deep, thoughtful than normal.... and they are right.

When i was in the shower I thought about how long I'd watch the show. I mean I'd only watch it till the end of the season I am on (2nd out of 2), then I'd go back to pursuing the Lord through reading. Then I realized, even after that show I would be drawn to something else. A new show, maybe Revolution (show coming out about the power going down worldwide).

Then I began to wonder, where does it stop?

Sabbatical

So I took a sort of Sabbatical this week, working only 2 hours on Thurs and 2 more on Friday. During this Friday I decided to read as much as I could of Lee Strobel's "The Case for Christ".

I don't know what it is. I'm not sure if it was just being immersed in a great work on Christ for hours.

I'm not sure if it was that the Lord is starting to show me the pride in my life through allowing me to see how corrupted my flesh really is.

I'm not sure if the world and media have just been beating at my heart inserting doubts of God's existence, constantly hearing the message that Christians are blindly following a myth.

I don't know what it is, but for some lovely reason the Lord has been showing Himself ever the more to me.

As some of you know a business which I have been laboring at for about a year has been extended/put on hold until January. This sorta devastated me more than it probably should have. I just felt like I was spinning my wheels if I wasn't moving forward. With a job at Compassion which is very tedious, manual, and very unchallenging. Living in a place where I have very few friends, and fewer that I can be real with. And living in a house where I rarely see my roommates.

I was beaten down. But I truly believe the Lord of the UNIVERSE gave me this time as an opportunity. I really want to use this time as a pilgrimage, trying to learn more about God. Meditating on Him trying to get my head knowledge into a heart knowledge.

I am finishing up Lee Strobel's "The Case for Christ" soon, and I'm trying to decide what book to read next. Any suggestions?

TEKEL - to be found wanting

TEKEL - You have been weighed on the scales and found wanting

This word is one of the words the fingers/hand write on the wall during the reign of Belshazzar of Babylon (Danile 5).

I don't know why this hit me so hard, probably because of a recent run-in with my besetting sin. But for some reason I find this word one of the most comforting and convicting words in scripture.

Each one of us is weighed on the scales and found wanting. Every one of us. But think about yourself. By yourself you stand on the scales, stepping on timidly hoping in what good you've done. But the scales begin to tip and you realize that you are the farthest from sufficient there is. You look out and see the Father, knowing His wrath will be upon you.

But instead, Jesus, takes a step onto the scales and they quickly rush in the opposite direction, His grace covering you insufficiency.

Again, I don't know why this hits me the way it does but it is freeing in a couple of ways.